I am not feeling very Christmas-y this year. Maybe less than usual, but it is hard to tell. I still feel like I'm treading water. Intentions to finish a couple of stories I started, to restart daily exercise, to start eating healthy again, all come and go. The sadness and the emptiness and the dark thoughts just keep welling up and I fight them down and go see friends and family and keep making plans in the short term because that's how I keep going. I don't know how much the lack of sunlight is influencing my mood so I don't know if it will get better come spring, which makes it hard to celebrate the solstice. I'm just so very tired.
But there is new Doctor Who on Christmas Day, so that's something to look forward to. My son is home for a bit and I have two weeks off work. D&D sessions to plan for January, and maybe even dancing on New Year's Eve. Just need to keep swimming.
