Friday, November 2, 2007

Pain!

Well, only a bit.

Wednesday I had my bottom right wisdom tooth out. Coped remarkably well if I do say so myself, helped slightly by the dentist being very nice and rather cute. Hasn't been too bad since but I've swollen up like a hamster making eating somewhat difficult. This was after all three of us had started to recover from colds, so this week has been fun-filled. If sitting around feeling not-very-well is your idea of fun, that is.

Been staving off depression fairly well until today. Oversleeping but that's only to be expected really. Today was...a struggle. The Terror's in a whiney mood again and I really didn't have the patience for it. Got letter back from Community Mental Health Team - being referred as outpatient to a psychiatrist and our former health visitor will be getting in touch for help and support with the Terror. I can't complain really as I'd expressed fears of not being able to cope, and the woman in question is very nice indeed, but....I know what I ought to be doing with him, it's just so hard to actually motivate myself. We'll see. Could be seeing the psychiatrist will also just end up being another chore and another thing to dread and wish I didn't have to deal with. Or not. We'll see.

Having got tea from the chippy this evening I nipped into the corner shop to get a couple of cans of Scrumpy Jack. Hubby still has plenty of beer left over from last weekend when he apparently didn't drink any of his own. Was absolutely gobsmacked by being asked for ID. I fumbled in my purse for a bit and tried to fob her off with credit cards and my university card but I knew she couldn't really accept them. Crushing sense of disappointment as I walked home, which led me to decide maybe I shouldn't just pick up my passport and go back for them. I shouldn't want a drink that much. But then I shouldn't want to speak to a certain person so much that every time he leave the coffee room I have to stop myself from bursting into tears, either. Blah.

Just got to keep on going. Always just got to keep going. Day after day after day. Maybe tomorrow I can buy cider. Or chocolate. Or even better, both.

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